How
many times have you found it difficult to get out
of bed in the morning, go to work or school, answer
email, or return a call? Procrastination is a common
compulsion but what lies beneath it is more pervasive.
This is resistance. Resistance is pushing away, avoiding,
looking in the other direction even when something
is trying to call your attention (like overdue bills).
Resistance is an experience of frightened parts of
your personality. In fact, it is inseparable from
them. The frightened parts of your personality –
those that are angry, jealous, resentful, etc. –
resist the world the way that it is and they are in
pain. When they are in pain, you are in pain. Temporary
relief comes from re-arranging the world the way that
the frightened parts of your personality desire, but
the respite is always brief because the world will
not stay that way.
The phone will ring when you want solitude, a bill
that you forgot to budget will arrive, your car will
need gas when you are late for an appointment, and
on and on (and on). These are all painful experiences,
for example, your solar plexus area hurts when you
are upset and your chest area hurts when a relationship
is not going the way that frightened parts of your
personality want it to go. The pain that you feel
when the world is not the way that you would like
to be – if you take the time to put your attention
in your throat, chest, or solar plexus areas among
others – is real but experiences of frightened
parts of your personality are not always as real as
they appear.
Overwhelm, for example, is a common experience of
resistance. The perception of the frightened part
of your personality that creates it, from a more healthy
perspective, is an illusion. You might have more than
you can do at the moment (or you might not but while
you are feeling overwhelmed it seems that you do),
but your sense of urgency and physical discomfort
have a deeper cause than the amount of work that you
have to do. They are experiences of fear-based parts
of your personality that see themselves as inadequate,
unlovable, unworthy, and flawed. They fear that if
people could see them as they are, people would not
want to be with them. There are many ways that people
try to mask these uncomfortable, and sometimes very
painful, experiences. Becoming overwhelmed is one
of them.
Catching up with the things that you have to do, to
stay with this example, relieves the pain temporarily
but it will return. Something else will activate it,
and then something else, until you address the cause
of it – a frightened part of your personality.
That is real and the rest are experiences of resistance.
That is also why addressing the things that appear
to cause your resistance, for example, completing
everything on your task list, never keeps the pain
away for long. On the other hand, you can eliminate
your experiences of resistance (and anger, jealousy,
resentment, and more) permanently by feeling the painful
sensations in your body that frightened parts of your
personality create and, while you are feeling them,
choose to act and speak in the most healthy way that
you can instead of procrastinating, becoming angry,
seeing yourself as a victim or as inadequate, etc.
This is how to create authentic power.
If
you have any questions, please email me at Gary@seatofthesoul.com.
I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Love,
<<
Back to Gary's Soul Thoughts
|