 How
much do you allow yourself to experience your emotions?
How much do you allow yourself to truly experience
your pain when you see the pain, anguish, agony, and
the suffering of others, or you are enveloped in pain,
anguish, or agony yourself? To the extent that you
can experience your emotions fully, you can respond
to what you feel (make a conscious and, hopefully,
wise choice). To the extent that you cannot, you react
(do what you habitually do). Television gives you
an opportunity to see great suffering every day. Can
you feel what is happening inside of your body when
you see neighbors killing neighbors, parents and grandparents
searching desperately for missing children, when you
see mothers and fathers looking for each other, when
you see old and young people dying, when you see tens
of thousands who have lost everything they have worked
for all their lives?Do you mask what
you feel by going to the refrigerator, lighting a
cigarette, or having a drink? Do you indulge what
you feel by lashing out in anger, judgment, or criticism,
or spiraling down into depression? Or do you allow
yourself to feel the depth of the pain in you –
to actually feel the physical sensations in your body?
Especially notice what you feel in your chest, stomach,
and throat/shoulder/jaw areas when you are suffering
or you see the suffering of anyone. Put your attention
into these areas and see what physical sensations
you find there. Take note of them.
Learn to experience
your emotions in terms of the physical sensations
in these areas (tightness, aching, throbbing, stabbing,
etc.) because painful sensations there tell you that
you are frightened, and that is a good time to pay
special attention to what you do and say so that you
will not do or say things you will regret later, or
that will not help you or support others. In other
words, you can make a choice from a healthier part
of your personality, even while you are frightened.
Every emotion has
physical sensations. Practice detecting them and while
you feel them, even if they are painful (and you want
to blame someone for what you feel), decide if there
is a healthy response that you can substitute for
your habitual (and destructive) reaction. A response
that will be constructive for you and others.
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